At the beginning of a new year, we place all our hopes, dreams, and wild expectations of ourselves into our big plans. Sometimes (most of the time!) it doesn't turn out how we expected. 

Do you remember what you expected 2021 to look like when it started? What hopes, dreams, and expectations did you have?

In this blog, I share how to reflect with kindness and celebrate 2021 as we enter the last month of the year.

First, I want to share my story of 2021. Action prompts are at the end. 🤓

In January of 2021, I was nervous and excited about launching my first group program, The League of Impact Leaders. I was feeling humbled and energized coaching clients who were doing transformative social impact work and full of a sense of possibility for the learning that new year would bring. 

But underlying that excitement was a quiet voice telling me something might be off. I was buzzing with energy but also physically shaking as I entered the new year with rigid standards for myself - Mondays for writing, Tuesdays for private coaching, Wednesdays for group coaching, Thursdays for curriculum, and Fridays for virtual networking.

I powered through each week with the determination of The Little Engine That Could, often running on fumes by Thursdays but still pushing through thanks to the productivity pressures I had learned from my past work experiences.

By May, I learned that I had a serious case of Graves' Disease, an autoimmune disorder that causes hyperthyroidism. And in June, just when I thought I had it all taken care of, I learned that I was in the .2-.5% of people for whom the medication for Graves' Disease causes destruction of white blood cell production. I ended up in the ER from strep throat and no white blood cells and spent a full week in the hospital in isolation, receiving semi-experimental treatment to boost my white blood cell production.

By the end of the month, I had white blood cells again and was able to get a full thyroidectomy surgery (my first surgery with the exception of wisdom teeth) and a sweet new gash of a scar across my throat. For the full story, you can read this and see the heavily filtered photos of me during that time on instagram because looking back, I truly looked like trash and wasn't ready for you to see me like that.

By July of this year, I realized it was not going to be quite the year I expected. 

Recovering took way longer than I expected and as our first cohort of The League of Impact Leaders wrapped up in August (thanks to Nagela Dales and Jennifer McDowell who joined us as mentors!), I was ready to focus more on collaborations. 

Fast forward to the Fall – I joined the founding team of an incredible startup, Exponential Changemakers alongside some of the most brilliant, passionate, and kind people I've met, started consulting in the social impact space, totally revamped The League of Impact Leaders based on what I'd learned from the amazing first cohort, annnnnnd on a sunny surprisingly warm morning in November, I got married to my amazing partner, John. 

So yeah, a sh*tty autoimmune disease wasn't on my vision board in January, but neither was marrying my forever crush or getting to co-create a freaking amazing social business with a team of fabulous people.

As we wrap up the last few weeks of 2021, it's easy to feel bummed about what didn't work out or give ourselves a hard time to spending too much time on Instagram (guilty 🙋🏻‍♀️). But is that actually helpful? I think not. 

Instead, I've built on one of my favorite tools for reflection so that you can realistically reflect with kindness before even thinking about expectations for the new year.  

I've used "I like, I wish, I wonder" which I learned from the team at Unreasonable Group for years now. Switching it up a bit, let's reflect with 3 points for each with "I'm learning, I'm surprised, I'm celebrating by." 

Here's my example:

I'm learning...

• That my body needs a whole lot more rest than I gave it in the past.
• To turn off tech for good chunks of time - scrolling through Instagram rarely feels like decompressing for me.
• To be honest about what I'm struggling with, especially when I feel pressure to show up as someone with all my shit together.

I'm surprised...

• How much I've learned about my body, trauma, and about autoimmune disorders.
• How easy it is to say yes to the right people and opportunities.
• How much I enjoy quiet solo time now (and conversely how much joy and energy this extrovert gets from helping out in the wine store downstairs from time to time!)

I'm celebrating by...

• Taking my first loooong vacation in years the last few weeks of 2021
• Thanking my lost but not forgotten thyroid for all its teachings
• Seeking out laughter and fully embracing my own silliness each and every day

What are your learnings, surprises, and celebrations? Reply below or email me at [email protected].

Before you go...

If you want to jumpstart 2022 with the right mix of big dreams and personal development, I'm hosting another round of The Courageous Leadership Challenge. Check it out here and sign up by December 20th to receive a future discount for private coaching, group programs, and retreats.